It took me more than 6 months to actually write this. Wow.
Much article. So discipline. Anyway, this time I will write about how the crazy roommate saga ends!
You might be thinking "But, Leandro, I thought you already had finished this story after he got kicked out of the apartment in Part 2!" Well, no. There is still one great final act in the mad theater of a mentally ill roommate's mind. Not as great as being hunted by gopniki in a park, of course, but still worth telling.
So here we go. Part III. The comeback. The end of the saga!
|You will never look at a fridge the same way after this article|
So what happened then?
As of the end of the last article about this crazy roommate, he was kicked out, and we were living our happy lives in the freak-free world.
Yay! There was just one teeny tiny detail. Remember when I wrote on Part 1 that we had to sit down with him and convince him to pay for part of our fridge, so he could keep his food from rotting and all that? I'm sure you don't remember any of that, shame on you, so I put a link right there. I wrote this story almost 1 year ago, and I had to check myself what I had written back then. Memory just isn't the same after you reach 25...
Nonetheless, he did pay for part of the fridge in the end. And we didn't give his money back when he was kicked out, of course. I guess when there's a police officer threatening to arrest your roommate you don't just go like "Oh, dear, the fridge!".
Just out of curiosity, tell me, what does a normal, sane, reasonable person does when someone owes them money? Maybe you can knock at their door and give a friendly reminder that you spent some money on a fridge that you are not using, right? Or, in case you are not really talking to the person because you tried to beat them up, and they didn't really like it, maybe ask a mutual friend to talk with them about it?
Of course not! Why would you ever do that? Try accusing them of stealing money from you. Try doing that in front of your teachers and faculty members.
You can probably imagine my reaction when I was having my classes at the university, and the dean called me to her office. I was literally being accused of stealing money.
He didn't try talking to me, or to my roommates, or to the dorm director. Nope, it was straight to university administration, like they have nothing else to worry about.
And how was this situation solved?
I was invited to the dean's office to clarify the situation, with the crazy guy, and in front of the university administration. Of course, I promptly said that he was talking about that goddamn fridge money that we took to cover expenses for buying the goddamn fridge, but he was not able to use it anymore because he was kicked out of the apartment for trying to punch me and then trying to get some gopniki to hunt me in the city park. Try reading that sentence in one breath
, I dare you.
You would think that this would be the end of the conversation, but no. Of course not. Why would things ever be so simple? It's never simple. Never.
We stayed in that room for more than 3 hours discussing exactly how much I needed to pay back, since he did use the fridge,
and technically he couldn't use it now because he didn't have the keys to our apartment. By the end of these 3 hours, both me and the dean were just imploring him to accept my offer of returning 5/6 of the price he paid. But he wanted his full share of the fridge. Even though he bought his share with a huge discount, to begin with. Yes, that makes no sense, I agree.
The fact that his claim made no sense didn't stop him from calling his girlfriend on his phone to explain the situation to the dean. You might be asking yourself "What did his girlfriend have to do with that? HE HAD A GIRLFRIEND?", which is exactly what I asked myself back then! In that exact order!
|"Why did I buy that fridge? Why, Lord?"|
In the end, the dean herself decided to call a fridge rental company to find out daily rental costs, and calculated how much I should pay back. In case you are wondering, it was ₽375.00, or a bit less than $5.00.
Ever thought sharing a fridge could be this complicated? I certainly hadn't. From then on, I don't share fridges with anyone, not even loved ones. They can buy their own fridges if they want to, or leave their food in the balcony, it's as good as a fridge for half of the year in these parts.
Could it be? It finally ends?
He kind of laid low, I guess, and then moved to Crimea at some point. I don't know where he is now, I'm just happy it's likely far, far away from me.
Look! Behind you! AH!
That's all for today, folks! You're welcome to share your stories about crazy roommates or fridges in the comments!